Heart of Berlin

Inspirations from Kerstin Hack

Category: Joy (Page 3 of 7)

Growing in Trust: I like God

22. January 2014 /

1604888_10152201214041972_1827025902_nThis morning as I stood in the kitchen still half-asleep, it suddenly came to me: I like God. Of course I honor and obey Him – He’s God. That’s obvious! But as I stood there and considered whether I wanted orange juice or coffee or both, it suddenly hit me: I like God.

  • I like His creativity, the range of colors with which He makes plants and flowers – I like His creative power.
  • I also like His approachableness, His warmth, and nearness.
  • I like His brightness, His expression.
  • I like the depths of His heart.
  • I like that He talks to and with me.
  • I like that He hears me.
  • I like that He knows me and still wants to discover me.
  • I like that He enjoys taking care of me.
  • I like Him.
  • I really like Him.

Sometimes I wish He was different. I wish He would act more often like I imagine. But when I imagine that I had a husband who was the way I sometimes wish God would be, I’m horror-struck. I would soon be seeing Him like a wimp who does everything that I say. Terrible!photo.php I currently have three Portuguese men on board who are helping me. Sometimes, when I tell them: do this or that this way, they say clearly, “No!” usually with good reason: because it’s better another way. Sometimes it’s just because they prefer to do things differently. This is also good and motivated by the wish to support me and help me in the best ways! And I don’t have to carry any heavy bags when they are near: they enjoy taking the burden from me. In looking at this, it’s clear to me: I even like God when He is sometimes “macho,” when He insists on His own independence and doesn’t let me tell Him what to do – at least not about how He should do things, and nevertheless acts out of love for me.

  • I like God!

– See more at: http://kerstinpur.de/glaube/im-vertrauen-wachsen-ich-mag-gott/#sthash.WN9DAD0y.dpuf

Growing in Trust: Sad Answers to Prayer

19. January 2014 /

Did I trust today? Yes! Trusting God – during and despite disappointment in humans During the first phase of renovation, I worked together with a shipbuilder who took responsibility for the work. He worked on many areas properly and well, but unfortunately not on all. In some areas, this is not so tragic: when new lacquer is laid over old lacquer on the ceiling and both come off together when someone hits their head against it, it’s annoying. However, when in the underwater areas of the ship rusty spots aren’t cleaned or insulated, it’s not just annoying, it’s life-threatening. Every rust spot is a source of danger if not treated. So my prayer in the last few months was that God would make me aware of all of the places that need to be reworked. I discovered a spot with black core rust in the seminar room in the keel of the ship and another further above. 2014-01-18 17.06.30Yesterday, someone helped me lay insulation. He didn’t get it stuck well in the corner, and I pulled the insulation up to show him how to do it properly. Suddenly, I didn’t just have the insulation in my hand but also a palm-sized piece of lacquer and rust. I almost cried. It is so frustrating when I can’t trust the work that someone else did (The black areas on the picture to the left are rust spots. The big black areas to the right are black insulation). Hier ist der - gerade erst 5 Monate alte - Lack schon wieder abgeblättert. Here it is – only 5 months old – lacquer already flaking. This morning as I was talking with God about it, it became clear to me: God is answering my prayer. I had asked Him to show me the areas that aren’t sound. The area yesterday was really a random find… normally rust hides well under white lacquer. Yes, I am sad that there are bad spots on the ship despite the performed and paid work, but I am thankful that we’ve already discovered some of the most critical spots. God has obviously answered my prayer. 2014-01-13 16.02.37 I am also thankful for the people who help me. Last week, my cousin derusted and oil-sealed about 15 square meters that according to my estimation and the opinions of multiple shipbuilders whom I asked hadn’t been worked on at all. Now, friends from Portugal are painting it again with primer, and then we can put on the insulation. The whole thing cost me three extra weeks of time and was very frustrating, but better safe than sorry. In short: I am sad that the situation is the way it is and thankful that God answered my prayers and thankful for the support of other people! I ask my God to comfort me about my experienced harm… and am excited to see what He comes up with! – See more at: http://kerstinpur.de/glaube/im-vertrauen-wachsen-traurige-gebetserhoerung/#sthash.CcHN4Gs4.dpuf

Growing in Trust: The Foundations for Trust

16. January 2014 /

Stapel Bild0006Did I trust today? Yes! Above all, I trusted that I have enough time for taking breaks – despite or perhaps because I am currently in the middle of a writing marathon. A first milestone has been reached: the manuscript for the inspirational booklet about Coco Chanel is finished. I enjoyed being preoccupied with this fascinating woman. The next weeks will bring the following: an article about God’s promises, the quadro Lean and Fit, a lecture: Nonviolent Communication, another lecture: Spirituality and Psychology. Then two more inspirational booklets: Friendship and Grief. Although I enjoy writing and do so quickly, this is still a lot of work. Oh yea, I’m building a ship on the side which means all kinds of organizational work. The Foundations for Trust I recently asked myself what the foundations for my trust in God are. The basics for me are these four things:

  • – God is good and trustworthy in His essence.
  • – God is powerful and can shape and change situations (even if He doesn’t always do so).
  • – God is relational. He want’s to be close to me.
  • – God is task-oriented. He wants to cause good things in this world.

Upon these cornerstones, I can anchor my trust:

  • Because God is good, I can trust that He is also good to me.
  • Because He is powerful, I can trust that He can also act for me.
  • Because He is close to me, I can feel secure.
  • Because He wants to affect things in the world, I can trust that He will help me in the tasks with which He has entrusted me.

This doesn’t mean that I expect everything in life to go smoothly. That would be a delusion. God is powerful, but He limits His power within the boundaries of the personal responsibility of people and the expectation of being invited to act (Christians call this invitation “prayer”). – See more at: http://kerstinpur.de/glaube/im-vertrauen-wachsen-die-basis-fuer-vertrauen/#sthash.dyKesEZQ.dpuf

Trust 2014

11. January 2014 /

IMG_0980Over the last few months, I often asked myself the question: was I alive today? I feel like this is not going to be my theme for the next few months. I am alive, and I am aware of life (sometimes more, sometimes less). I notice an inherent liveliness and am pleased. This year, it is important to me to grow in trust. I would like to trust God more, trust myself more, and trust other people more (as appropriate). For me, appropriate means: according to how well I know people in general and this person in particular. Some people, whom I know very well and have known for a long time, I trust very much. For others, trust is still growing. First, I have to discover in which areas I can and cannot trust them. What have I learned today about trust? It is lovely and calming when I can trust people. On New Year’s Eve, I prayed for the new year with a very good friend. For more than 15 years, I have known her as a woman who has a very intimate relationship with God and is sensitive to hearing Him speak. We asked God to tell us what is important to Him for the different areas of my life (publishing company, ship, health) and then discussed what we each heard internally. About health, she said that the keyword “salt bath” came to mind. She couldn’t figure out what it meant, but I knew. I know that stress, both internal as well as “only” physical (like through building a ship), overacidificates the muscles, and natural sea salt or rock salt brings balance and regeneration. For Christmas, I (not completely unselfishly) gave my neighbor and friend, Sonja, a two-for-the-price-of-one coupon book. There wasn’t a coupon for a salt bath in the book, but there was one for Saltero: a massage and a time of relaxation in a completely salt-coated grotto. After a while there, it was as if I were at the sea: my airways are clear again, I can breathe more freely and deeply, my back is wonderfully relaxed, hours later my skin in still pleasantly lightly salty, and I am wonderfully relaxed. It wasn’t exactly a salt bath, but it was pretty close. Without the impulse from my friend, I surely wouldn’t have gone, and now I am very glad. Trust was good to me. And: I would like to go there again… – See more at: http://kerstinpur.de/erlebnisse/vertrauen-2014/#sthash.EayO7Uve.dpuf

Discovering Life – Ants and Kings

29. December 2013 /

IMG_0220Was I alive today?

Yes!

What new thing did I learn about life?

From a report via a television program on the topic the beauty of women: Lebanese women are considered the most beautiful women of the Near East because of their facial features and figures – my German-Lebanese friend told me about it. They spend tremendous amounts of time and energy on creating and maintaining their beauty and go, when they can afford it, to the salon around three times per week. In a society where the ratio of women to men is 3:1 (many young men work abroad), enormously high competition reigns. 90% of all women choose to have their children via cesarean section, because they see it as safer and less beauty-threatening than natural birth. Right now, the young women who are educated are finding themselves in conflict regarding whether they want to continue to “play the game,” but they often don’t have a choice.

What new thing did I learn about myself?

Sometimes it bothers me when I compare myself to how things should be done – and I find it wonderful when God then says to me, “You are good enough.” There are people who can plan things to the smallest detail – I am not one of them. I can only approach things in stages and layers.

Once in a while, people criticize me for the way I am approaching things with the ship, “Kerstin, you should first contract with engineering consultants to draw up a complete plan before you proceed.” “You should contract with a ship-builder…” etc.

My good friend, with whom I am currently enjoying a few restful days, prayed this morning and asked God what He would like to say to me. She felt like she should read Proverbs 6. Among other things, she read, “The ants are self-organized, have no king, yet still fill their barns!”

She felt like God wanted to say to me, “Kerstin, there are work teams that don’t have a king to tell them what to do. With your ship project, you have teams that more or less organize themselves. And that is OK! That’s also a possibility. And you will reach your goal and ‘fill your barn.'”

That really encouraged me. I don’t need to be anything other than myself… I am allowed to be how I am… and my God deals and works with me in my fashion. How incredibly comforting!

– See more at: http://kerstinpur.de/erfolg/leben-entdecken-ameisen-und-koenige/#sthash.qe0ztKJQ.dpuf

Discovering Life – God has Outdone Himself Again

22. December 2013 /

2013-12-21 17.59.59Was I alive today?

Yes! I am thankful that my biggest wish is being fulfilled and also that the first layer of insulation is up in the engine room before Christmas. Now, the cold (if it comes) isn’t a huge threat anymore.

What new thing did I learn about life?

It is amazing and full of surprises.

What new thing did I learn about myself?

I have a lot of fantasy and imagination. I think I’m creative in my solutions. Yet, sometimes God does things that surpass my wildest fantasies, and that means something.

His last coup: I had prayed for several months for a real electrician who could support me in the whole electric installation (about which I am clueless). This was one of the things that gave me the most stomachaches. When I have a stomachache about something, I pray and ask God for help.

His answer: He sent me an electrical engineer who is also a trained boat builder with a passion for ships. A few months ago, he found his way through gospel music that deeply moved him to the God about whom they were singing. My project is composed of many things that relate to him: his abilities and passions and his new journey with God. He is now helping me with the planning and will support me as much as he can within the limits of his possibilities (he is self-employed)… It doesn’t get better than that.

Icing on the cake: The only time that was possible for him to see my ship for the first time (he lives further away) was Saturday morning. The only time that worked for the man who is going to build the solar system for the ship was Saturday morning. So they came at the same time and planned things out so that everything works together. Some of it was Greek to me, and I had some things translated for me into layman’s terms, but it sounded really good.

– See more at: http://kerstinpur.de/erlebnisse/leben-entdecken-gott-hat-sich-mal-wieder-selbst-uebertroffen/#sthash.MVMauP5m.dpuf

Discovering Life – Side by Side

18. December 2013 /

2013-12-18 08.07.30Was I alive today?

Yes! Experiencing a sunrise on the ship was wonderful!

What new thing did I learn about life?

There are rarely “purely” wonderful or terrible times. Most of the time, life is a good mixture. Today, I was on the ship pretty early in order to welcome a helper… I am so thankful that Bernd (the third person I know who is named Bernd!) is helping me to remove over a hundred fishplates so that we can install insulation.

In addition, I am thankful that so many different people are currently helping me practically or supporting me with small or large contributions via bank transfers, Paypal, and Betterplace, which help me to purchase the necessary materials to finish the ship.

Last but not least, I am thankful that we have removed most of the fiberglass that proved itself unsuitable for insulating non-flat surfaces onboard. A piece of it is now insulating a hut in which a homeless man has found shelter. Another piece is helping a young man to save on his heating bill, because his landlord doesn’t want to insulate the attic, and he was heating all the way to the roof.

2013-12-18 09.39.36Only – as we saw the steel under the fiberglas, I was shocked. I had expected to find good anti-rust paint underneath, but what I found was approximately 18 square meters of steel covered in a light coating of rust. The world isn’t going under and neither is the ship (not yet!!!), but it is a new problem.

What new thing did I learn about myself?

I feel emotions faster and can accept them sooner than I used to. If such a situation had occurred in the past, I would have said, “We’re tackling this; let’s get rid of it!” This is the first thing I thought today as well. Then I noticed relatively quickly that I also had a few feelings that wanted to come out: disappointment, sadness, frustration. So, I swallowed a few little tears and then said, “Now, I’m tackling this…”

I experience this as more consistent, healthy, and authentic.

– See more at: http://kerstinpur.de/allgemein/leben-entdecken-nebeneinander/#sthash.ROeMWNkZ.dpuf

Discovering Life – Seeing Categories

10. December 2013 /

2013-12-08 11.15.55Was I alive today? Yes! Especially during a short walk in the rain. What new thing did I learn about life? It helps to sort into categories! A while ago, a friend sent me a puzzle postcard from her vacation. She knows that I love puzzles, but this one was really annoying. It was a picture of hundreds of seashells. There was so much detail and so many shells that it was impossible to see a big picture. It was all photographed from the same distance, without big differences or perspective. The assembly took a lot of energy. As I decided to give it another try, I thought about how many people live their lives like this: tons of puzzle pieces that won’t assemble into a big picture, because they can’t see any picture due to all of the confusing details. Often, the job of a coach is about helping sort and finding perspective and categories. First, a border is built and then, discovering step-by-step (sometimes with painstaking detail work) what fits together. 2013-12-08 11.31.14 It helps when we sort first. I did this today while coaching someone who is searching for clarity in his life. We sorted things into different areas of life and then further into various categories. In the end, we found a coherent big picture, even when some of the pieces needed for deeper happiness were still missing. But now, he can go searching for those and add them in. What new thing did I learn about myself? I can be just as joyful about small things as big things. Today, in the late morning, I suddenly felt the strong urge to take out the trash. This is not normal for me ;-). As I arrived, I discovered in the top of the recycling bin a sheet of insulation that is wonderfully suited for sealing provisional doors which leak cold air. I took it and rejoiced like a child. Even more so because I saw the garbage man coming; just a minute later would have been too late. I thought about the Bible verse “He knows His own…” – God knows them inside and out and knows how He can bring them – in this case, me – joy… a total gift! Later, I received a donation that I used for insulation so that my guests will be comfy and warm in the future… I rejoiced about the “small” gift just as much as the “big” one… both are signs that I am seen and supported – how wonderful! – See more at: http://kerstinpur.de/erlebnisse/leben-entdecken-ebenen-wahrnehmen/#sthash.5gGG2pm0.dpuf

Discovering Life – Shepherds and Sheep

8. December 2013 /

IMG_0183 Was I alive today?

Yes!

What new thing did I learn about life?

What new thing did I learn about myself?

I often begin the day by reading Losungen – selected inspiring Bible texts… Yesterday”s was:

“I am the good shepherd; I know my own sheep, and they know me.” (John 10:14, New Living Translation)

This touched me deeply on two levels:

  • My Job = Trust: It was a reminder for me that trust is asked for. Sometimes things don”t go fast enough for me on the ship. I would prefer to be further. And it”s sometimes a real challenge for me to let go and to trust that God is already leading me. There is a saying, “Many people want to serve God, as an advisor!” I often belong to this group. I have 1000 ideas about what He could do faster and better. It”s sometimes really dificult for me to let go and to trust that HE is the shepherd and daily gives me what I need for that day. I have decided to practice this more intensively and to declare to God my trust that He has everything in view. And He means well.
  • His Job: To be the Shepherd – and to care for me in the way that I need. “I know my own sheep” left an impression on me. It really touched me to be reminded that He really knows me. A few days ago, I did a really good personality test. The results were not really surprising: I am a visionary, am bored to death by housework, and live in the future, in what should be. And I”m hard on myself – more than others – when things don”t go fast enough.

As I read the verse, I thought and prayed, “Ok. I want to trust You. For today. But hey, it also says that You know me. And if You know me, then You also know that I need encouragement. I need to see that things are (quickly) moving forward. You know that there is nothing that brings my heart more joy than when things are moving in the right direction.

God must have heard my prayer… things are moving forward. I am rejoicing about:

  • Two friends who helped me yesterday to put up insulation so that we could come forward faster
  • 2o 25 Euro donations for the ship project by Betterplace and Paypal… again two more hours of work further
  • Four friends from Portugal who wrote that they would like to come for 7 or 8 days to help on the ship and really make some progress
  • A friend who wrote that he would like to sponsor the trip of one of the Portuguese because 3 of the 4 are unemployed and don”t have any money
  • 30 Euros worth of selling used books on Amazon… not huge, but every little bit helps
  • Over 400 Euros worth of selling books from our publishing house at a church bazaar. Of course the proceeds go first to employee wages and production costs, but anything left over goes into the ship
  • A woman who called and asked if she could help… she is currently doing a practicum in Berlin but has plenty of free time and energy and was looking for a meaningful activity to engage in… a friend told her about me…

My heart rejoices… because things are moving forward… and because I sense that my God sees me…

– See more at: http://kerstinpur.de/allgemein/leben-entdecken-hirten-und-schafe/#sthash.etNrLSsu.dpuf

Discovering Life – Influential Men

6. December 2013 /
Nelson Mandela Biography

Was I alive today? Yes… I enjoyed having time to clean and sort in the office today due to the snow. Next week, I will be writing more again and also doing a lot of coaching! What new thing did I learn about life? I was in a play about Kennedy – to mark the 50th anniversary of his murder. The play mentioned how many illnesses he had: massive medical problems in his stomach, intestines, back… twice he was so close to death that he had his last rights from a priest, and he often used crutches privately and wore a corset to relieve his back… even during his murder… which lead to his not being able to take cover after the first shot. He clearly understood how to hide it. But how would it have further developed if he had become as old as Nelson Mandela, who died yesterday? He really impressed me… his constant readiness to learn and to grow. He gave the slogan “Each one teach one” to his co-prisoners in jail: everyone who can do something or who knows something should teach it to others. In this way, he made the long imprisonment into a formative time for himself and his co-prisoners. A very impressive man. What new thing did I learn about myself? Stories fascinate me. The life story of Kennedy, but also the stories of my friend, Rosemarie, who told me what it was like to see Kennedy in person when she was a little girl. That was before my time… I wasn’t even born yet. – See more at: http://kerstinpur.de/allgemein/leben-entdecken-praegende-maenner/#sthash.jYybVno5.dpuf

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Balanced life, Forgivenes, Restoring Trust.

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Foto Kerstin Hack
Name: Kerstin Hack
City: Berlin, Germany
My Job: Author, Coach and Publisher. My aim is to inspire people to live life well, enrich others and fully enjoy god and life.
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