Heart of Berlin

Inspirations from Kerstin Hack

Category: experience (Page 3 of 5)

Discovering Life – Hard and Soft

14. October 2013 /

Was I alive today?

Yes!

– What new thing did I learn about life?

People always quarrel about strategies – seldom about goals. Yesterday, I saw the lovely film, The Butler, (worth watching!) that describes the life of a butler in the White House from the 1960s through today. Especially moving: He and his son both wanted to improve the living conditions for people of color. But they had very different ideas about how this should happen. The father wanted to wait; the son became politically active. Although they had the same goal, their strategies were different. This lead to conflict and estrangement.

Non-violent communication stresses the importance of making the need under the strategies transparent. Like here, the need for being respected and valued. When the need is deeply understood and accepted, cooperative strategies can sometimes be found to meet it. And sometimes not.

2013-09-27 16.37.52-1– What new thing did I learn about myself?

I need softness as balance for hardness….  The last couple of weeks were hard. Sick co-workers, hard work, hard misunderstandings, hard calculations, hard decisions, hard work on the taxes, hard, tight muscles. Even the materials on the ship are steel-hard and you can only work with them with hardness. Last night, I dreamt that someone told me that I need softness.

So, I have pronounced this week to be a soft week. I will wear soft clothes, observe autumn flowers and leaves, let the wind blow on my face and the sun warm it, work less hard when the sun is shining, listen to warm, cello music, take warm showers, drink coffee with soft milk foam and eat Schokoküsse (wonderful soft marshmallow coated in chocolate!)… and, as much as I can, be soft with myself – in thoughts and actions.

– See more at: http://kerstinpur.de/besser-leben/leben-entdecken-hart-und-zart/#sthash.nIQmk1Q8.dpuf

Discovering Life – Shaping Courageous People

11. October 2013 /

2013-10-11 09.41.40Was I alive today?

Yes!

I especially enjoyed the mild autumn air and the bold-colored leaves on the trees. Simply wonderful.

– What new thing have I discovered about life?

I’m still in shock: muscle tissue turns into fat in less than three weeks. I caught a cold three weeks ago and haven’t been able to move around as much as I normally do in the last few weeks. It especially affected my lower back and bottom. It didn’t want to get better, and I was awake every night (how parents survive this when they have little children, I don’t understand) in pain, so the doctor cautiously ordered an MRI. All-clear. No problems with my spinal discs. Thank God! But the MRI showed something else appalling. In less than three weeks, my body had classified a whole bunch of tightly-wound muscle tissue as “inactive” and therefore “worthless” and broke it down from muscle (which is dark in an MRI) into (light) fat cells that use less energy. In only three weeks! I find this very intense!

– What new thing have I learned about myself?

I can rejoice in the happiness of others – especially when I have somehow contributed to it. Yesterday, I received a letter from a woman whom I first met through seminars and coaching and would now consider a friend. She wrote to me that she had gotten a boyfriend and was now engaged. This does happen. This morning, I remembered a coaching discussion we had a few years ago. It was about her future. She had to give up her absolute dream job because the employer was not able to continue her position.
First, we spoke about her dreams and her wish to shape young people, and then later discussed which possibilities were open to her at that time. Finally, she admitted, “I already have a position. As an administrator for a residence project for older people. I think it’s the right thing; I can gain administrative experience, and

Suggests careful years down will work www.geneticfairness.org summer and this reach afternoon:.

the people there really want me.” She continued to tell me all of the benefits of the new position. I became more and more uneasy. It seemed as though she wanted to convince herself and me that it was the right thing.

At some point, I gathered my courage and gave her honest feedback, “Your eyes are saying something different than your mouth. You say that it’s the right thing, but I don’t see any excitement.”
My feedback led to her admittance that she didn’t actually want the position but had just talked it up to herself. She declined the position and dared to become self-employed offering the support for young people that had always been her dream. It was not easy, but she succeeded. In the end, she moved to a place where she found suitable premises and – coaching happy end – also the man with whom she will share her life.
Of course this is a dream-like coaching story. It’s not always so dramatic, but I often experience that I can help people discover what they actually want – not what they should want. And when they dare to follow their dreams, I beam for joy.
And you – were you alive today?

– See more at: http://kerstinpur.de/coaching/leben-entdecken-mutig-menschen-praegen/#sthash.3oS4wVh1.dpuf

Discovering Life – Perceiving Deepness

4. October 2013 /

2013-05-04 12.06.52– Was I alive today?

Yes!

The nicest moment was when my father (a widow) called me and asked, “Kerstin, what do I put in the salad?”
“Vinegar.”
“I did already.”
“Olive oil”
“It’s empty. Can I use sunflower oil?”
“Yes. And then you need salt and pepper.”
“Yes – can I also put in tuna and tomatoes?”
“Yes!” He has not EVER made salad for himself in his entire life. I found it nice to be able to accompany him.

– What new thing did I learn about life?

The things that move us deeply often have to do with deep experiences. Yesterday, I heard a worship song by Don Moen on YouTube. His song “God will make a way” touches me every time I hear it. At a concert, he told the story of the song. He had just found out that his sister and brother-in-law were in an automobile accident. A young man drove into the side of their car. Their youngest son died immediately and the others were seriously injured.

In his confusion, helplessness, and pain, the words of Isaiah 43 came into his mind: “God will make a way, where there seems to be no way…” God will make a way there where there is no way.

The song was born out of deepness. I sensed this every time I heard it… I am thankful now to know its story.

– What new thing did I learn about myself?

How I begin the day shapes the whole day. Yesterday morning (it was a holiday) I messed around, and for the rest of the day, I couldn’t really get into the swing of things. It wasn’t bad, I rummaged around… but it was clear to me: how I begin the day shapes the following hours.

– See more at: http://kerstinpur.de/erlebnisse/tiefgang-spueren/#sthash.c1xlrF6I.dpuf

Discovering Life – God Can

17. September 2013 /

2013-09-17-08.17.36– Was I alive today?

Yes!

– What new thing did I learn about life?

Two things are moving me right now. The first is that one harvests what one sews, even if it’s years later. This message came in a moving 3-Minute Video. There are prayers and “faith-investments” that I sewed more than 30 years ago, and of which I still wait excitedly for the harvest. In one areas, I “harvest” with a twinkle in my eye. A while ago, I published the inspirational booklet “Gebetsnotizen” (“Prayer Notes”) to encourage people to take note of their prayers and the ways in which God responds.

In the last couple of weeks, I’ve been moved by the story of the quails and manna. In this story, a leader is confronted with a challenge: a few hundred thousand people want meat. Even if they slaughtered all of the animals they had, it wouldn’t be enough. And soy burgers hadn’t yet been created. It was impossible for him. And then his God asked him, “Is anything impossible for me?” The answer is, logically, “No.” And then God seriously dished up – the Israelites had the BBQ of their lives. Mountains of meat. Nothing for vegans. But the others were happy.

This story moves me in relation to my boat. The beginning agreed-upon budget has now, through mistakes and unforseeables, been exceeded by one third. And another 50,000 Euros worth of costs are due by April 2014 – and then after that, I still have to repay the loans. I am doing what I can to offset the costs:

– I publish books

– I sell used things

– I coach people

– I give lectures

– I rent out my guestroom to vacationers

– I want to give blood

– I live economically

Impulsheft GebetsnotizenBut even with these efforts, obtaining the needed 50,000 Euros in 8 months is impossible – for me. But not for my God. Going back to the inspirational booklet Gebetsnotizen that I made a few years ago: I am currently using it myself for my prayers about the ship project. And while I was turning to a new page this week, I saw:

“Is anything impossible for God?”

I thought it was funny to be reminded through my own booklet of the assurances of God that are currently moving to me. I think God also smiled. Now I am excited to see when and how the quails will fly to me.

– What new thing have I learned about myself?

I am soooo alive when I coach. Today, I had a coaching appointment about cravings. To coach about this theme is essentially a really simple skill. One discovers where the customer has bound eating, or a specific food, with certain emotions, and then breaks the bond. Through this, “the spell is (more or less) broken” and it loses its power. It makes me happy every time to experience how things get unbound in people’s minds and new thoughts and feelings are now possible for them. It’s simply wonderful.

– See more at: http://kerstinpur.de/allgemein/leben-entdecken-gott-kann/#sthash.407hu1a1.dpuf

Discovering Life – and Making a New Friend

11. September 2013 /

2013-09-11-19.00.50

– Was I alive today?
Yes! And how! The best moment of the day was when I successfully got all 12 balls into the faces of the Astrid Lindgren figures with my new friend, Lukas (3rd grade), and he asked me at the end, “Will you be here again tomorrow?” Heartwarming.

 

– What new thing have I discovered about life?
When a water pipe is clogged, it doesn”t necessarily mean there is grime in it. I was on board and was trying to unclog an overflow pipe from the roof and was poking around in it. And I was surprised when instead of grime, a huge spider came out. NO, I did NOT scream! But only just! Screaming is only useful when someone else is nearby who can hear it. It”s only half as fun alone.

– What new thing have I learned about myself?
It”s really difficult for me to go along when someone is whining and complaining. Today, the sandblaster told me how difficult it is to get the coating off of the floor of the main room. He said this in a whining undertone that automatically released in me these feelings:

– He”s not doing well.

– I am responsible.

– I have to do something so that he will be doing better.

My auto-program offered to pay him more (before the freecar racing car racing games mobile rest of me even had a chance to think about it), even though we had already agreed upon a price. Ouch. That wasn”t necessary. How someone feels is really their own problem. He could have said instead, “Gosh. This coating is being difficult. But I, the MacGyver of Sandblasters, will be the master of this project.” And he could have felt like a hero. I hope to get something from life for the expensive premium I paid… What I already know in theory – that I am not responsible for the feelings of others, but only for my own behavior – I hope I can internalize this even more!

 

– See more at: http://kerstinpur.de/erlebnisse/leben-entdecken-und-einen-neuen-freund-finden/#sthash.FJoLzFcm.dpuf

Discovering Life – An Experiment

9. September 2013 /

2011-03-14-22.08.33-300x225

I recently read about Jess and Tim, two New Yorkers that have been friends for years. They asked themselves whether they could fall in love if they spent time with each other every day for 40 days. So they began the experiment “40 Days of Dating,” and told about it in a Blog. (For those of you who are curious, they fell in love – and it remained complicated).

One thing that really moved me, other than the cool and unique idea, was that every evening they would ask themselves:

– What new things have I learned about the other person?

– And about myself?

I think these questions are exciting and great. First of all because the reflection surely helped them to keep things in their memories that otherwise would easily be forgotten. It often wasn’t the “big” things that they noted, but rather small ones: his shopping behaviors, her smile, something that they learned about the other person’s childhood, and much more.

I thought to myself: I could try this. Not necessarily with a man, but with life itself. To ask myself every evening for a while:

– What new thing have I learned about life?

– What have I learned about myself?

And share the answers with you (perhaps not daily, but some evenings).

This is also similar to the spiritual practice of asking yourself every evening: When was I most alive today? And when least? (A great book on this topic: Sleeping with Bread)

This is also a bit of self-care for me. At the moment, I have a ton of things to organize and manage. First, for the publishing company. But I also have to make daily decisions and organize things for the ship project. And then the lecture season with seminars and events across Germany begins next week. In times like this, the danger is high that one will forget to enjoy life; to notice the small, beautiful moments of daily life. For this reason, I would like to really pay attention to this, especially because so much is going on right now.

Current/Yesterday
– What new things did I discover about life?
A man that I’ve known for a long time told me about a practicum in an industrial enterprise, shift work, and sandblasting. I know him primarily from working together in committees and prayer-actions. To hear about his experiences in a completely different area of life brought us closer together. I found this valuable and pleasant.

– What new thing did I discover about myself?
It is not easy for me to concentrate on only one thing for a long period of time. As we prayed yesterday on the ship that God would give his blessing, I prayed with my whole heart… and occasionally cut away (with bolt cutters) rusty screws that I noticed when I opened my eyes. For me, this was the perfect mixture of concentration.

I invite you to participate and to tell in a comment about a moment that you experienced when you felt really alive.

– See more at: http://kerstinpur.de/erlebnisse/leben-entdecken-ein-experiment/#sthash.cEbNtRJD.dpuf

Feeling Responsible

9. January 2013 /

To start off with:feeling respon 2013-11-04 17.59.58 sible is not a feeling. This might surprise you because “feeling responsible” feels like a real feeling. Yet, when we examine it carefully, this feeling is made up of two parts: -the thought: “I think I am responsible.”

  • -a feeling: pressure, anxiety,stress, excessive demand, sadness.

I am not a person who usually splits hairs, but in this case, this is important to me. This differentiation can open the door to freedom. When we realize, “I think I am responsible,” we can critically evaluate:

  • Am I actually responsible?
  • To what extent am I responsible?
  • Do I want to be responsible?
  • Who else is responsible?

This alone can take the pressure off. There are situations in which we are actually responsible. For example, parents are responsible for their children: more when they are small and less the more they grow. But what is with the feelings that we feel? In most cases, the “feeling” of responsibility is nothing more than empathy and resonance bound with sadness. We sense that the other person isn’t well. We feel it with them, and we have our own feelings about it as well: sadness, helplessness, pressure, or something similar (depending on the situation and thought patterns.). We then call this thought-feeling-conglomeration and hodge-podge “I feel responsible.” What can we do? In my opinion, adults carry the responsibility for their own lives themselves. I can’t and don’t have to carry the responsibility for anyone who is an adult. It is their responsibility. At the most, I can take partial responsibility – during a coaching session, I have the responsibility to create a good process. As a publisher, I have the responsibility to train my employees well, etc. Once in a while, it happens anyway that I “feel responsible.” A good friend is stressed; I perceive this and think that I have to help him. A good friend isn’t doing well; I slide into feeling responsible. When I notice myself doing this, I always do two things internally:

  • consider if and in which forms I would like to support the person and communicate this to him or her
  • say inside: “I put the responsibility for your life back into your hands.”

My friend, Rosemarie, recommended a third sentence that I find wonderful:

  • “I bless you that you can carry the responsibility well.”

I especially like this third step. I can and may bless, which strengthens and supports others in their ability to master their lives. I find this relieving and exhilarating. By the way, the photograph above is two barges from an aerial view. It is good when a barge only carries its own burden; otherwise, it would sink. – See more at: http://kerstinpur.de/besser-leben/sich-verantwortlich-fuehlen/#sthash.cvzs4ag9.dpuf

Building a space for God

25. June 2012 /

This morning I read the book of Haggai in THE MESSAGE. The introduction spoke to me:

” God doesn ´t live in buildings (“The God who made the heavens dosn´t live in custum-mades shrines.”)….

We are not angels. We inhabit space. Material – bricks and mortar, boards and nails – keeps us grounded and connected with the ordinary world in which we necessary live out our extraordinary beliefs.”

The book of Haggai then describes how the people were building a place for meeting up with God. And how God told them “I am with you” and “I own all the silver and the gold.

It encouraged me for my boat project. God does not need a space. Yet – we need spaces that help us meet up with him. That is my dream for this boat that it would become a space where people

– could meet God – the God who is with you

– could find healing

– could find new hope

– could find friends.

We will start building NOW! The shi

http://goexback.com/ How to win back your ex

p is still in Hamburg and we will start renovating there because there we are allowed to make a lot of noise.

How you can help?

– Come over and help practically: We can use a lot of strong guys and girls who will help scratch of rust, lay floors, scrubb floors etc. in the next months. You can stay on board while renovating.

– Art: If you have special skills to make things party digital entertainment, however with Mattrick focusing elsewhere and promising to “properly densify talent,” how lengthy will Ginzburg Olsha last?AUSTRALIA To Research Social Networking ROLE IN SOCIAL GAMING AND GAMBLINGOn the other hand from the Gulf Of Mexico from Zynga’s Bay Area headquarters, scientists at Australia&#8217s Southern Mix College have released new research “investigating the promotion of and use of gambling and social game possibilities through social networking and mobile platforms. beautiful and express God´s glory and would like to contribute – let me know.

– Pray: Stuff works better when God blesses. I appreciate prayer that things will go smoothly,for provison, enough help – simply for a lot of blessing on the project.

– Send some silver or gold: To pay the professionals who work on the boat every work-day costs about 80 Euro. If you would like to sponsor the project you can sponsor one (half) hour, one day or one week of work….(0r two, or three).

If – like me – you're strapped for cash – you might consider selling something at ebay, amazon or etsy and donating the gains for the project.

The easiest way is to use my paypal account: Kerstin Hack (make sure you get my name right): info(aaaaat)down-to-earth.de

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Balanced life, Forgivenes, Restoring Trust.

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Foto Kerstin Hack
Name: Kerstin Hack
City: Berlin, Germany
My Job: Author, Coach and Publisher. My aim is to inspire people to live life well, enrich others and fully enjoy god and life.
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